Nottingham-on-sea… but it’s not, is it?

Notice Nottingham features an article on the Nottingham Riviera and announces grandly that it includes: “Activities and entertainments, beach cafes and stalls selling all the usual seaside souvenirs including buckets and spades, sun glasses, Nottingham postcards and Nottingham Rock, along with a large Speedo paddling pool, all help to complete the seaside holiday.”

But it’s not the seaside is it? It takes more than 300 tons of builders’ sand and a large paddling pool to recreate even the drabbest and most mundane English seaside resort. It takes the sea for a start… and rocks and crabs and seagulls… and proper seaside sand.

Without these, Nottingham-on-sea is like a large building site into which the kids have sneaked through a hole in the fence. 

The City’s stated aim of providing entertainment for people who can’t afford to go away on holiday may be laudable and I would certainly not want to deprive them of this but, having visited the Nottingham Riviera at the weekend, my overwhelming impression is that’s it’s cheap, tacky and tasteless.

So, on second thoughts, maybe it is like an English seaside resort after all…

Brown, BNP and Brinsley

The Brinsley by-election takes place tomorrow (Thursday) and, leaving aside the Tory candidate’s pronouncements which, unsurprisingly, revolve around money as usual (specifically a potential rise in the parish precept), the statements by two of the other candidates perhaps show most what is at stake in this small North Notts ward.

BNP candidate, Nina Brown, lists protecting the green belt and tackling crime and anti-social behaviour as her priorities. Predictable, populist and presumably to be achieved by repatriating all those Eastern European criminals and not allowing black people to picnic on any grass in the area.

On the other hand, Ed Jacobs, the Labour Candidate said: “As Labour’s candidate, I want to fight for something new: a kind of politics which concentrates not what on divides us, but on using the talents of the people of Brinsley and beyond.”

I think that means the talents of all the people of Brinsley, Ms Brown, not just those who can prove they have had Anglo-Saxon ancestors for the last 20 generations.

Magpies set to soar

Notts County getting Sven-Goran Eriksson as their Director of Football is undoubtedly a coup for the Football League’s oldest club.

I can’t help thinking that they deserve some success in the near future after spending so long in the shadow of their bigger and more successful rivals across the River Trent. So I hope that the combination of Eriksson and McParland’s skills and experience and the cash of their new owners will see them climb into League One next year and perhaps even challenge Forest in the Championship the year after (although Forest should be in the Premier by then…).

But Erikkson’s position as Director of Football  is a strange one, considering that Ian McParland will remain as manager. The BBC reports that: “the Swede will be responsible for transfer negotiations and scouting, health, fitness and development of players, training facilities, the youth academy and establishing community and overseas links”. With his assistant, Tord Grip also joining the Magpies as a ‘general adviser’, it seems that McParland will only be responsible for day-to-day running of the club and actually picking the team.

That’s fine but it feels a bit like a situation where Alan Sugar or Richard Branson take over the corner shop and are only reponsible for opening up in the morning and ordering the beans.

I hope it works because Notts County – and their loyal fans – deserve it to but I don’t think all their troubles are over yet.

Reduce, Reuse, Freecycle

I’m a member of the Nottingham Freecycle network, which is a fabulous way for people to get rid of things that they don’t want, thus preventing them ending up dumped in landfill (or in a lay-by) and, at the same time, helping people to get stuff which they probably don’t have the money to buy. It’s an economic and environmental system that reduces waste and allows goods to change hands without a single penny being involved. I’d advise anyone and everyone to sign up.

However, amongst the flood of e-mails that I receive offering or asking for things, are some gems that are more noteworthy for their amusement value than for anything else. I’ve reproduced a few below (I’ve kept the original spelling and grammar for obvious reasons).  I’m not intending to ridicule the people who posted these messages (and the serious side of Freecycle is the extent of poverty in Nottinghamshire that it seems to suggest) but they are funny.

WANTED:

Shell paddling pool/sandpit

Has anyone got one of these laying unused/unwanted? I only need one half, to use as bath for tortoise.

Book: Boy in Striped Pyjamas

Hi, has anyone got a copy of the boys in striped pyjamas they have read, i would really like to read it. Thanks

Washing machine

Washing machine in working order. This is for my auntie who’s died recently. She is currently having to beg steal or borrow whoever’s washing machine isn’t being used when she needs clean clothes! Good working order please, thanks soooo much…

Portable TV aerial and booster

Has anyone got either a portable tv aerial or booster (both if possible) that they no longer need or use as our daughter broke ours yesterday (after us having it for nearly 5 years) :’( We need both if possible due to our younger daughter sometimes waking up late (we get her back to sleep by having the portable tv on upstairs and her dropping off slowly in the middle of me and her daddy, last night we really had a bad night with her and i think its due to the fact we cant put the telly on for her to settle again, she likes tv noise in the background)

King-sized bed sheets and duvet covers

looing for king size fitted bedsheets and a duvet cover or pillow covers. a duvet would also be accepted! going through quite a few of these at the moment as i still dont have a washing machine. can collect from anywhere in the evenings on weekdays.

Car

hi everyone i no this is a big ask but i was laid off recently and lost
my car because of it, i am in desperate need of any kind of car as long
as it is driveable/road worthy and pos mot’d, thank you for reading

 Alanadale’s note: I thought this was a hopelessly unrealistic request, but then I got this…

1992 Ford Fiesta 

After being flooded with many requests, we have now gifted this car, I am sorry to not reply to you all individually but there were just so many people asking! I feel bad that I can’t help you all

 Stair gate

Looking for a stair gate as the dog is about to have an operation and need to stop her going upstairs for a few weeks. Will then pass on to someone else.

OFFER:

Vintage car magazines

 A carrier bag of vintage car magazines from the 70’s.

 Roll of brown plastic-baked material

Roll of material with a plastic backing, possibly some kind of wallcovering,
slightly crinkly along the edges but theres a good few metres and would prob be useful for craft project.

A pallet

1 Travis Perkins pallet.

 And finally, the message that must have brought crushing disappointment to so many…

The chocolate fountain has been promised , sorry to all those who were unlucky this time.

 

Green and pleasant Meadows?

The news that a £200m regeneration of the Meadows is to go ahead will be welcome news for people who live there and should also be celebrated by the rest of the city.

Let's hope images like this are in the past for The Meadows

In common with places like Hyson Green, Radford and St Ann’s, the Meadows has, for too long, been synonymous with poor housing, crime and deprivation. Also, in common with the redevelopment of St. Anns in the 70’s, much of the ‘modern’ Meadows appears to have been built to design crime in rather than out and to create an claustrophobic atmosphere which has served only to emphasise the physical isolation of the area from the rest of the city. It has also helped to foster a feeling that the Meadows is an island of crime and disadvantage floating at a respectable distance from the gentrification of the city’s Lace Market, the fading opulence of The Park Estate and the middle-class smugness of West Bridgford; a place visited by most city dwellers only when they want to park their car for the Riverside Festival or get lost trying to get off the Embankment after the Sunday picnic by the river.

Of course, physical infrastructure will not solve the problems of the Meadows on its own and I think Councillor Alan Clark, portfolio holder for Neighbourhood Regeneration at Nottingham City Council, is a little naive when he says: “This funding will transform The Meadows into a stronger, more sustainable community which will benefit residents and businesses as a whole”, but, with the commitment of local residents, the continued work of the Meadows Partnership Trust and other agencies and organisations in the area and with some imaginative, grass-roots development work with people in the various communities that make up the area, things could be looking up at last.

I certainly hope so.